<books>

How Emotions Are Made by Lisa Feldman Barret

People feel depressed when they fall short of their own ideals, but when they fall short of a standard set by others, they feel anxious.

Even when you feel no sense of agency when experiencing emotion, which is most of the time, you are an active participant in that experience.

I do not speak of perceiving someone’s emotion “accurately.” Instances of emotion have no objective fingerprint in the face, body and brain, so accuracy has no scientific meaning. It has a social meaning. We certainly can ask whether two people agree in their perceptions of emotion or whether a perception is consistent with some norm, but perceptions exist within the perceived.

Landslide, True Stories by Minna Zallman Proctor

“I spent years waiting for my long dark night of the soul to end—to come to a righteous, triumphant conclusion. Is it here now? I’m fine but not fine. I can behave for the most part like the person I was but I am changed. Un-innocent. These descends into dark nights are murky like Waiting For Godot. They don’t end, reveal, or release us into bright inner peace. Quite the opposite. The characters are left staggering off the stage, alive to wait another day. It’s a sad journey without a grail.”

“The pleasure of not belonging, however, never wore off. I was always a visitor, a foreigner. It was, I think, my fortress against being misunderstood.”

“When the nurse calls me back an hour later I’m in H&M standing in front of a faceless mannequin garishly dressed in a red Icelandic sweater and Christmas lights trying to figure out if I can pull off fake leather pants if it turns out I do have cancer.”

 

<film>

I Am Not Your Negro by Raoul Peck 

James Baldwin: “In America, I was free only in battle, never free to rest, and he who finds no way to rest cannot long survive the battle.”

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”

The root of the white man’s hatred is terror.

Call Me By Your Name by Luca Guadagnino

Mr. Perlman: “We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster that we go bankrupt by the age of 30 and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to make yourself feel nothing, so as not to feel anything, what a waste.”

 

<elsewhere>

Teal Swan:

  • Most spirituality is nothing more than one giant coping mechanism because the ego itself is nothing more than a coping mechanism for life. That means that most all spiritual practice feeds the ego.
  • Our degree of internal suffering is about the degree of harmony or lack thereof between our internal selves.

 

Greta Gerwig on making Lady Bird: I knew that when things came up that were problems or difficulties or something went awry, that was not a deviation from the path, that was the path.